Just Perfect

"Are you going to keep trying for that girl?"

How many times over the past five years have I heard somebody ask me this question? Too many to count. It often follows close on the heels of this gem or maybe this one.

No. No, kind people of the world, I am not going to "keep trying" for "that girl."

And.

For the record.

The more I dwell on your question, the more offended I am becoming.

I resent your insinuation (or outright statement) that my family is not balanced or not close enough to some ideal because we do not consist of one boy child and one girl child. I even heard or read or something somewhere that one person felt sorry for the 3rd child of one gender in any family because it was "obvious" that the parents were trying to get the other gender. Really? As if no parent anywhere would desire to have 3 children for any reason other than to balance the sexes.

I have 3 boys. I have no desire to try for a girl. My 3rd boy was not the result of my trying for a girl. I do not in any way feel that my family is lacking. I do not think that I am missing out on anything. I do not consider it to be unfair in any way.


For those people I have heard comment about the need for a boy in their families as someone to throw the ball around with, I say throw the ball around with your daughters. I guarantee they will love it.

For those who think they need a little girl to dress up and chat with about the meaning of life, I recommend having a meaningful conversation with your sons. It might just open your eyes to some pretty amazing things.

For the folks I have heard lament the lack of a son or a daughter and how they long for the kind of relationship that would be possible with that child of a different gender, I would like to suggest trying to have a better relationship with the children you do have instead of longing for something that doesn't exist.

For anyone out there who might be tempted to open your mouth and comment about my need for a little girl in my family, don't. I really don't want you to make my boys feel like they have disappointed me in some way just by being who they are. They are God's gift to me. I wouldn't change my family for the world.